I haven’t written a post on here for an absurdly long time. I think that’s because everything was sort of just going quite well, and my tics had been really on the down low for ages. Quite frankly, there were no incidents to spark the inspiration for a post.
Now the fact that I am here again shows that nothing lasts forever, and my tics for the last week have been worse than I ever remember them being, even before I was on tablets! Quite annoyingly this happened as I was talking to some friends and said, “Yeah, my tics have been really quiet recently. It’s great!”
Tourette’s clearly didn’t want to be forgotten about, so two days later in a (tutor-less) drama tutorial I was twitching badly, hitting myself in the throat and saying my new constant vocal tic: “Achoo!”. But then, out of nowhere, I dropped the f-bomb. I didn’t know what to do. My group giggled, and I did initially because it was odd, and I don’t have coprolalia but this incident begged to differ.
Later on our tutor actually came to try and offer us some guidance, and I was still ticcing away, not subtly punching myself in the neck or face, and again accidentally swore. My tutor then just said “Language!” in a condescending, exasperated tone. And that was that.
I left the tutorial (luckily I had been leading them outside where I drama group wanted our performance to start with another girl, so she stayed and I ran away) and was left as a mess if tears wondering what on earth I was going to do.
Luckily for me, the small group I am working with for drama are absolutely lovely and gave me hugs and made sure I was OK (one even went with me to sit in a toilet while I calmed down), and they all seemed completely baffled that a tutor that I have had for over a year could even consider saying that to me. Continue reading